Rebooting. Restarting. Recommitting.
This topic isn’t a new one for me. In fact, I write about it at least once a year. Because at least once a year, I get off schedule and it takes me longer than I want or expect to get back in my groove. This time around, I gave myself permission to take spring break week off–I didn’t even schedule an archive post. (That was partly a choice, and partly a reflection of how busy I was before I left town).
And that part is just fine. I talk all the time about how important it is to walk your talk when it comes to self-care. Taking a week off isn’t a big deal.
The problem is this–it wasn’t really about spring break. My writing schedule had been off balance for a couple of weeks before I left town, and it’s taken me almost two weeks to get started again. The problem was my time management. I’m really busy in the office right now (therapy is a cyclical thing, and late winter is busy season!). And I wasn’t building in enough time to write. So, even though my writing is a commitment to my readers, even though it’s a part of my week that I really enjoy and look forward to, I let it drop.
I got out of the groove, and the ideas weren’t flowing as easily as I had gotten used to.
I changed my practice and following through got a lot harder.
I started to feel embarrassed about the fact that I hadn’t been on schedule, and that made it even harder to write.
Does any of this sound familiar? Does it parallel how you might be thinking or feeling about something that matters to you? Have you been trying to exercise, or meditate, or eat vegetables, or keep a journal? Did you do it for a little while, and begin to enjoy it? Were you starting to find your groove? And then life happened. The car broke down, or you had a flare-up, or work got busy. Something happened that interrupted your new habit.
Welcome to the club. The truth is, this cycle of committing and recommitting is what relationships (with ourselves or anyone else) are all about. We try, we succeed, we try, we drop the ball. The most important thing is that we keep on trying. And that we are compassionate and nonjudgmental with ourselves. This is what life includes. Getting out of sync isn’t a failure, it’s a sign of being present in a busy, dynamic, messy real life.
So, if you are in the “offline” position with your own self-care, I’m inviting you to join me. I’m rebooting. I’m activating my compassion and I’m reconnecting to my commitment to write.
What reboot are you starting?